Writing for HS, AM (Scalice, '07): Samantha Carr

Samantha Carr

Posted by scarrgo at 2007/07/09 07:44:47 PDT

I agree with most of what the essay is talking about. After getting lost a few times and re-reading it a couple of times I was able to get some of the premises. It is true that most innocent and poor people have to pay for that by being oppressed or exploited. Soceity could decide to change it and help the innocent people but society tends to look away and ignore it. It is all true and it has been happening for hundreds of years. I think this is a great arguement but the people who look away and ignore it already know it. Society could undo it but they might be afraid that it would hurt their economical market and then cause them to lose their job. People also live in fear and if you could get rid of the fear then you could change the wrong in human society and make it right again.

I think that it is great that you offer sugestion to get rid of the problem but they also made me worry. I am worried that society would have to turn into an utopia in order for everyone to be treated equally and everyone's talents could be used in jobs. I am personally not a fan of utopias because people are hidden from most hurt and pain and live quite dull lives. With out changing society into an utopia I wonder how you could change it without hurting society. has the author done anything to solve the problem or help the people? I think that if you were to make up laws that didn't scare society then you could be very successful in helping the people being exploited and opressed and you could also do fundraising as well.

3 Comments

Excercise

Posted by scarrgo at 2007/07/05 12:01:09 PDT

#1.) I was fortunately still in the wings and could go over the steps but I lacked enough time to review my whole dance, but I walked onto the black floored stage with a big grin on my face.

#2.) tangable noun- can hold or touch or is an object
box, chair, table, rose, hersey chocolate, cloud, earings, computer, water, apple

intangable noun- abstract things
dreams, thoughts, stinky, hope, destiny, feeeling, sight, love, hope, wisdom, sarcassim

Metaphors (using of)

rose of destiny
the table of hope
a cloud of dreams
chocolate of love
an apple of sarcassim
a box of thoughts

Metaphor (uing is, are, has, 's,)
cloud's dreams
box are thounghs
chocolate has love
hate is an anchor
love is a battlefield

The word: Yellow

Yellow is the color that radiates from the sun and shines down on the earth. It is also assosiated with making people laugh. A banana peel is yellow and when someone steps on it they can slip and fall. It is the tool for a good humorous joke. Yellow is on my shirt and is the color that always brightens up my day. Everyone loves the color yellow and it can lighten peoples' hearts. Life is yellow and because it brings joy to everyone and can make them want to live.

The word: Chocolate

Chocolate is love because it makes people happy. The brown bar when slipped into a mouth melts into a lushous river of thick delishous goodness. It makes everyone happy with its abundance of sugar and caffine.

Corrections:
Nice description of how it melting. The description makes my stomach growl in hunger.

Thank you.

The word: flower
Flower power! It can be a symbol of love or lies. A flower can smell good or it can smell as bad as a skunk. Some flowers eat flies or fingers. They are thought of being harmless but in horror movies are man eating plants of danger and fear. Roses are beautiful to look at but are dangerous to the touch.

final paragraph

Flowers, chocolate and yellow bring joy to everyone. You can also eat all of them. When someone writes about them it makes them hungery so they might eat some. Unfortunately, like anything else they can be dangerous. Flowers can be piossonis when eaten, chocolate can make people sick if they eat too much and a yellow banana peel can cause someone to slip and hurt their back or butt.

Meaningful words:
joy
banana peel
man eating plant
melting
laugh
chocolate

The chocolate fed the man eating plant so the laughing men did not get eaten instead. When the father slipped on the banana peel, joy spread throughout the hearts if the family then melted into fear when the fater could not get up.

0 Comments

Nerves

Posted by scarrgo at 2007/06/28 11:34:15 PDT
Edited at 2007/07/05 09:42:41 PDT
descriptive essay

My nerves made my stomach churn creating butterflies that fluttered throughout my body. This was my last show because I had an injury which made it hard and discouraging to dance and I wanted this to be the best show of all the performances that I had ever done. When I was on point it hurt greatly and, as a result, made my feet stiffen so I could not get all the way over on the box- the flat part of a point shoe. This was the second time ever that I was this nervous to perform and I forgot my steps. Luckily, I was still in the wings and could do over the steps but I did not have enough time to go over the whole dance, so I walked onto the black floored stage with a big grin on my face.

I was quite nervous now and there was nothing I could do. I bowed to the Grandma and Little Match Girl. So far so good and I saw them walk away off the stage leaving me all alone in a big black sea. There were hundreds of eyes staring at me to see if I would float and perform, doing all the steps and making them look carefree and easy or sink by scowling or pausing in the middle of my dance because I did not remember my steps. I was still smiling but as I started my first steps my smile started to melt. I was concentrating too hard on my steps to remember to smile and look happy.

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